Yarning Over Madonna

Does it bug you something fierce when you get songs stuck in your head?  What about a whole repertoire from two plus decades worth of tunes from the same artist?  This has been my problem since learning Madonna is a crocheter.

Since I don't have access to her to inquire about her crocheting passion I decided to use titles from her Top 40 hits for my make-believe interview below.  I hope you enjoy it as much as I did creating it:

We met one rainy afternoon in a local yarn shop that had comfortable seating spaces for the patrons.  The store owners brought Madonna and I a cup of hot cider to enjoy as we sat down for our interview.

D:  Madonna, I'm delighted you could sit with me today.  I see you're wearing a beautiful crocheted wrap.  Who would you say  would benefit from learning how to crochet?

M:  "Everybody."

D. Before we sat down I saw you eyeing a lot of wonderful fibers.  How do you go about choosing the fibers for your projects?

M:  It's a "Physical Attraction" thing. 

D:  When did you know, Madonna, you know, that very moment that you liked crocheting?

M:  I was on "Holiday" and brought it with me.

D:  And how do you feel about knitting?

M:  Hmmmm, "Borderline" I think.

D:  I understand that when you were first learning how to crochet that you didn't quite grasp the gauge thing.  When your projects came out the way that you wanted them to, how did it make you feel?

M:  Like a "Lucky Star" ((smiles))

D:  Once you got into crocheting more, I understand that you couldn't resist the fiber and kept buying more ...

M: I was a "Material Girl"

D:  So you just kept buying & buying yarn?

M: It kept calling to me "Crazy for You," how could I resist? 

D:  So, once you were aware that you had developed "Yarn Acquisition Syndrome," did you come up with a plan?

M:  Only that I'd "Live to Tell" about it!   ((laughs))

D:  I understand that there was some trouble caused by the yarn stash at home ...

M:  Yeah, I'd have to tell my "Papa Don't Preach;" he didn't get the obsession.

D:  I understand it was about this time that you and your first husband departed ways.

M: You're getting a bit personal, Dee, but yeah.  I mean I said to him "Open Your Heart" and he said that he'd like to be able to open a closet without seeing yarn ...

D:  I'm sorry to hear that but can attest that most of us crocheters have large stashes.   What is it that you like so much about crochet?

M:  That you can "Express Yourself"

D:  Oh, I agree with you there!   

M:  and you can "Cherish" the process and "Keep It Together" without worry of losing stitches.

D:  You are so right, Madonna!  I love that we're having this little chat!   Where is the last place you thought you'd find a crochet pattern?

M: ... in "Vogue" knitting magazine; have you seen it?

D:  I don't recall seeing it; I'll have to check it out.  I wonder, have your children said anything about your crocheting?

M:  Yes, they want me to "Justify My Love" for it; I guess the stash is taking over the house again.

D:  Oh dear!

M:  Yes, my son Rocco likes to play "Rescue Me" and hides in the boxes of yarn I have!  ((laughs))

D:  ((laughs too))  Yes, children are great like that!  You seem to be looking around the store a bit, what are you thinking?

M:  "This Used to Be My Playground," I'd come here and buy pattern books, hooks and yarn sometimes.

D:  I'd like to thank you for your time, Madonna, it's been a real pleasure.

M:  Oh same for me, Dee!  Go ahead, "Take a Bow," you did great conducting your first fictitious interview!

                                             (((heh heh heh))) 

Welcome to the Crochet Club, Madonna!